


Eyelids

by jaehyunismybias



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Bottom Lee Taeyong, Cheating, Jealousy, Light Angst, M/M, Non-Explicit Sex, Obsession, Top Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-16
Updated: 2021-03-16
Packaged: 2021-03-25 10:55:29
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,837
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30088038
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jaehyunismybias/pseuds/jaehyunismybias
Summary: Jaehyun faces his fear of mornings
Relationships: Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun/Lee Taeyong, Lee Taeyong/Nakamoto Yuta
Comments: 8
Kudos: 42





	Eyelids

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not sure what this is, but it sounded cool in my head.

_Jaehyun's eyes had always been a dark shade of brown - in the color of the sun they gleamed like whiskey through a glass, while in the dark of the night they were void of color, filled with darkness._

Jaehyun gripped the headboard, his knuckles turning a shade of white as he clenched the wood too hard.

Bliss. A white ecstasy blew through him as he bit into the pillow next to the others head. It was always the same, and yet different every time he got to experience the tight walls clenching around him, milking him dry. His eyes rolled back in his head.

With a guttural moan, Jaehyun rolled off the smaller body feeling the bliss slowly but surely leaving his body as he laid down on his back, panting to get his breathing back to normal. He stared at the ceiling.

Taeyong sighed in content and got up, ready to clean himself and go. In the process he pressed a chaste kiss on Jaehyun's cheek.

Also a usual routine, always the same - yet it stung every time he watched the other leave.

This was among the moments Jaehyun liked the least; having to witness his love walk out the door, only to give him a call one or two days later again. An endless circle of pushing and pulling, dread and ecstasy. Jaehyun felt empty.

It pulled at his heart, toying around like this. But he'd rather perish than end it - the closer he could be to Taeyong, the better. Even if it was just about sex.

He wanted it so badly; to hold the other through the nights, through the good and bad times. He wanted to be the reason for those bright smiles. He wanted Taeyong. Maybe that's what fueled him when he spoke up, still a bit blown from moments before.

"Stay the night."

Taeyong was still in the bathroom, but he heard him loud and clear. He knew it from the way the tap water suddenly ran undisturbed, and how Taeyong's movements stopped in the reflection of the mirror.

Jaehyun swallowed, meeting Taeyong's gaze through the reflection. He loved Taeyong's eyes, those fiery orbs of passion and life, but loathed what they held. _Pity_. Jaehyun hated how Taeyong sometimes looked at him. As if he _knew_.

"Jay-"

"It's so late. I'd sleep better, knowing you're safe." Jaehyun spoke before the other could protest, because it was part of the truth. He smiled to assure the other that this was the case. He'd die if he knew something happened to Taeyong when he'd walk the few blocks from Jaehyun's house home to his. He also wanted to keep the other for himself as long as possible, but he'd never admit that out loud.

He sighed softly, mind and heart lightening when Taeyong gave a curt nod and a smile before returning to wiping off the evidence of Jaehyun on him.

"Mind using my phone to text Yuta that he shouldn't wait up?"

Jaehyun managed a hum, but felt his whole mood sour from Taeyong mentioning the other's name. Technically, Jaehyun was the _other_ _one_ , but he liked to think optimistically. There was a reason Taeyong decided to go behind the other's back after all.

He picked up Taeyong's phone from the discarded pants on the floor, frowning at the lock-screen.

 _He_ should be the one pressing a kiss to Taeyong's cheek, _not_ Yuta.

Knowing the code, he unlocked the phone and went to the texts, typing a quick "don't wait up xx" and pressing send, knowing this was one of the ways Taeyong texted. He had been on the receiving end of multiple Taeyong™ texts, and knew all the little quirks by heart.

Jaehyun wondered what excuse he had used on Yuta this time for not returning to their shared apartment. Secretly, he hoped that Yuta would start suspecting him. A dark part of him wanted Yuta to know that he fucked Taeyong better that Yuta ever could. But he was a horrible person for even thinking the thought. Taeyong would be heartbroken, and he couldn't bare the thought of seeing the other hurt.

He'd die rather than hurt Taeyong, which meant that he'd carry the pain for him in the form of this deep dark secret they had committed. He'd let his own heart bleed, as long as Taeyong smiled.

Taeyong returned from the bathroom, a little fresher than before. He walked to Jaehyun's wardrobe, where he pulled out a pair of grey sweatpants and a t-shirt that would look a little big on him.

As if realizing that the clothes he was going through weren't in fact his, he turned around with a sheepish smile and spoke,

"You don't mind, do you?" while waving the clothes he held up, silently asking to borrow them. He didn't wait for an answer though, as he started pulling the shirt over himself.

Jaehyun shook his head and played it cool by yawning, before getting up to use the bathroom.

"All yours."

When he came back from the bathroom, face clean and bladder relieved, he found Taeyong's sleeping figure on his bed. His red head contrasted against the white pillow nicely, and Jaehyun's heart leaped in something that he could only describe as _joy_ when he saw him clad in his clothes. Jaehyun hoped they'd smell like Taeyong the next time he wore them.

His phone was in his hand, which he rested next to his head on the pillow, and Jaehyun's eyes automatically went to the flashing screen as the other received a text.

A single red heart is what Yuta had sent his boyfriend in response to the conversation (they probably had while Jaehyun was occupied). Jaehyun scowled, reaching for the phone and placing it up-side-down on the nightstand.

He didn't need his mind traveling to dark places now. Not when he had the source of light right here within the reach of his arm.

He tucked a strand of crimson hair behind a pierced ear, and leaned in to press a kiss to his temple, before reaching over him to turn of the lamp that illuminated the room.

He then crawled under his blanket and pulled it up over the other so that it covered him better. The temperature in his room was freezing, but Jaehyun didn't mind the cold. Taeyong needed the warmth more than he did.

The large window illuminated his otherwise dark room, enough that Jaehyun could still see all Taeyong's details without having to squint too hard. His handsome face looked so at peace, so _innocent_ , now that it was relaxed from it's previously blissed-out expression.

The determined eyes resting behind his eyelids made Jaehyun relax ever so slightly more. His sharp eyebrows and nose. His plump, ready to kiss, lips. His fiery locks and the silver adorning his ears. Everything about Taeyong made Jaehyun look and feel like a mere scrawny mortal where Taeyong was the God.

Jaehyun was tired, but for the life of him, he couldn't let himself fall asleep. He had to, _needed_ to, embed this image into his head. He'd have to stay awake long enough, so the morning would arrive slower.

He hated mornings, were it not for how amazing Taeyong looked right then. How the sun kissed his face awake, how his brown eyes squinted behind his eyelids to hide from the sun. How he snuggled just the slightest closer to Jaehyun, if just to hide his face from the burning light. That sweet feeling usually only lasted for a moment. Before the first words of the day were spoken, he had a sense of freedom.

It was hard to say _good morning_ , when it was followed with _good bye._

Like always, the next morning wasn't any easier than the previous.

He looked up from his book where he sat in his seat as he heard yet again one of the sounds that made his heart beat a little faster, and his eyes moved to the couple sitting diagonally from his seat. Yuta was sitting in his chair on his designated seat, while his beautiful boyfriend occupied his desk, face looking down at the Japanese.

They were talking, all big smiles and starry gazes. Jaehyun scoffed, silently, in distaste at the way Yuta rested his hands on Taeyong's jean-clad thighs, fingers playing with the strings from the rips in them.

His heart fluttered when Taeyong laughed again at something Yuta said, and his gaze lingered on the way the red haired boy's eyes glittered, and the way his pearly whites were on display. The class surrounding them was loud and filled with noise, yet he heard nothing else but the sweet sound of happiness emit from Taeyong.

Jaehyun looked back down to his book ignoring the way he felt waves of heat crash over him, ignoring how his ears were probably a vermilion color, and the way his jaw hurt from clenching his teeth together. He heard Yuta speak up, and felt gazes on him but ignored them. His words sounded like a buzz in his ears. Like a hornet trapped inside a glass.

"Jay? You down?"

A gentle push to his shoulder from the seat next to him made him look up from the paragraph he had pretended to understand for a while. He feigned surprise when Mark looked at him, equally wide eyes looking back at him.

"For what?"

Jaehyun had sincerely not heard a word, but knew that Yuta had been the one to say something so he couldn't really bring himself to care. Taeyong and Yuta looked at him now, as if noticing his existence only now. Taeyong's eyes were kind and curious - totally different from the usual way, the secret way, he looked at him when it was just the two of them.

Yuta shook his head softly, pushing his long, orange fringe over his forehead with a cheeky grin,

"You should get your ears checked, Jay," he squeezed a milky thigh between his lanky fingers.

He hoped the soft smile on Taeyong's face was directed at him, and not to the Japanese's attempt on a lame joke. Jaehyun reluctantly moved his eyes from Taeyong's brown orbs down to his book, feeling that he had stared for too long.

"I said; will you join us after school? My place?"

Jaehyun glanced over the same text again, eyes getting bored of the same black words on white page. He nodded silently, sending a reassuring smile to Mark before he resumed reading, turning the page of his biology book. _Chapter 13: Arteries and Veins._

A fitting caption. Jaehyun wanted to clog Yuta's with poison.

Yuta and Taeyong resumed to their mingling after this, content that their friend was on board. Soon the happy couple was disturbed as Mrs. Kim walked into class, indicating that recess was over and classes were to begin. Taeyong bid his boyfriend goodbye with a chaste kiss, before he hopped off the wooden desk and made his way out. 

_Jaehyun's eyes were green._


End file.
